Good Inventions (Part 1)

The word inventions comes from the words invent and ions. ‘Invent’ means to create or design; and ‘ions’ means an atom or molecule with a net electric charge due to the loss or gain of one or more electrons. In other words inventors create electrically charged, or ‘exciting’, new things.

The following are some of my latest inventions. Most of them just came to me out of the blue, or in other words ‘out of the blueprint’, which I’ve included for each.

The Ankle Sock

Lets face it, nobody likes to wear socks. What’s the first thing people do when they get home? Take their socks off and put them aside so that they can wear them again tomorrow. The only reason we have to wear socks is because we don’t feel like shaving out ankles everyday (other people do that right?). Voila – the ankle sock. A regular sock with the part covering your foot removed, just leaving the bit that goes around your ankles. Now you can go around sock-less all day and no one will know the difference!

(I’m working on something similar for sandals. A piece of fabric that looks, feels and is shaped like a sock but is actually called a ‘germouth’. It lets you go sock-less even in sandals and no one will know the difference!)

Disposable Bedsheets

(Note the two arrows in the diagram. Whenever you have two arrows you know that you are recycling.)

A tip for want-to-be-inventors is to think about something you hate doing in your daily lives and then come up with an invention that will make it easier. I hate making my bed. A normal person might think “there’s no other option, I guess I’ll make my bed”. Not me though, I look at my unmade bed in the morning and think “disposable bedsheets”. With them you can have a good night’s sleep and then instead of having to make your bed in the morning just throw the sheets away! I know what you’re thinking: this is terrible for the environment! That’s why I propose that these bedsheets be made of recycled garbage from landfills. How’s that for living green?

Universal Key

It’s very annoying to have to carry around keys for everything. your front door, your car, your diary etc. We have universal remotes, why not a universal key? It would work the same way as remotes. You’d put it into a keyhole and it would read the shape needed to open it and create it. Then you’d label that ‘home’ for example and could summon it (reference for the really cool people reading???) anytime you needed. Everyone would have one. I know what you’ve thinking: it would be unsafe! What if you lost your universal key and someone picked it up and had all of your presets. Well you would be able to deactivate remotely it the same way you deactivate a cell phone.

Numbered 4, 34, 51, 23, 6, 33, 245, 0 Cover

(Note the single arrow, indicating that this unfortunately isn’t made of recycled products.)

How offen are you tiping along only to fynd out that you don’t know how to spell a word. Well it never happens to me, but I’m sure it’s a common problem. If only there were some sort of database to help you. That got me brainstorming; I played around with a few ideas. Reducing the number of words in the English language+ (there isn’t any punctuation for when you extend the last two syllables of a word like this, so I’m coining the the ‘+’ as the appropriate puncuation in that case), some kind of telepathic device+ and so on. But like Occam said in that Gillette commercial: the right solution is usually the simplest one. This was also a computer problem so it required a solution specific to that medium. Then it hit me. A numbered keyboard cover that replaces each letter with a number, and an accompanying book that gives you the numerical code for any word you want to spell! That book will contain every word every invented along with the accompanying number code required to type it in (called a direct in consulation topographic interface on new alphabetic required yoking).

Future Projects

-portable doorbells
-page a minute calendars
-pencil with an eraser tip and eraser made of graphite, for writing on graphite paper
-finding more places in clothing to put pockets


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